Modern feminism has been experiencing a phenomenon of increased pressure to cater to men, as a growing number of women are striving to include men’s issues in their spaces and convince men to join the movement. This expectation in a space made for the advancement of women has worrying implications and is inherently unproductive.
The uptick in men citing declining mental health as an issue plaguing them has often been accompanied by a tendency to blame women for being uncaring or unwelcoming. It’s not that male mental health isn’t a worthy cause, but if men want to create a movement that aims to fix their specific issues, they need to start that momentum themselves. Saying women cause or contribute to the issue and should change themselves and their spaces to fix it is inaccurate and insulting.
The enemy of feminism is what forced the crisis to exist in the first place. Men don’t want to admit that their issues are caused by that common enemy, so they turn their condemnation toward women, the only visible others, making every issue an unproductive man versus woman debate.
The way many men approach raising awareness is completely backwards; most have never experienced oppression based on gender. They use statistics they don’t understand, like higher suicide rates, to prove they have it just as bad. But how can anyone comparatively say one is worse when women attempt suicide more and have higher rates of mental illness? If men want productive solutions to issues they face, they need to stop using them as a tool to win a debate that doesn’t exist.
Most other communities take the initiative to celebrate themselves and raise awareness about their issues. Queer communities hold parades and rallies during Pride Month, while women create campaigns and donation drives during Women’s History Month. Droves of men say not enough people observe Men’s Health Awareness Month without understanding that if they themselves took the initiative to communicate their issues as the default instead of a response, many would follow suit.
Women continue to try to force male involvement in feminism by showing that dismantling patriarchy would benefit men. But why do we have to prove that there’s something for men to gain? Men profit, monetarily and socially, from the unpaid and unappreciated work of women. There are few reasons for them to want to partake in feminism beside empathy, which should be a good enough motivator.
Feminism fights for equity, which cannot and should not be done in an equal manner. Bridging the gap in equity by furthering the rights of an oppressed group does not involve equal efforts for both sides of an uneven system. It is not a woman’s job to show unconditional compassion to someone whose pain manifests into apathy, misogyny or violence toward them.
Suicide in all forms needs to be prevented. There does need to be an effort for men to be made to feel safe expressing emotions and suicidal ideation without stigma, but it cannot be compared to fighting for basic rights. Because of this election, women will die at the hands of our system, culled like farm animals. Male mental health crises are not systemic nor rooted in historic oppression, but the mental, physical, emotional and social struggles women have faced and will continue to face are.
Before you remove yourself by calling this argument an overgeneralization that does not apply to you, remember that quite literally everything, including policy affecting women, is based on generalizations. If a general trend shows a pattern, it is the entire community’s duty to consider it. The video player is currently playing an ad.
#James Donaldson notes: Welcome to the “next chapter” of my life… being a voice and an advocate for #mentalhealthawarenessandsuicideprevention, especially pertaining to our younger generation of students and student-athletes. Getting men to speak up and reach out for help and assistance is one of my passions. Us men need to not suffer in silence or drown our sorrows in alcohol, hang out at bars and strip joints, or get involved with drug use. Having gone through a recent bout of #depression and #suicidalthoughts myself, I realize now, that I can make a huge difference in the lives of so many by sharing my story, and by sharing various resources I come across as I work in this space.#http://bit.ly/JamesMentalHealthArticle Find out more about the work I do on my 501c3 non-profit foundation website www.yourgiftoflife.org Order your copy of James Donaldson’s latest book, #CelebratingYourGiftofLife: From The Verge of Suicide to a Life of Purpose and Joy
It is not the feminist movement’s job to fight for your issues — it is yours. Women are raised to cater to their own oppressor’s needs, so it is no surprise that there’s a push for feminists to. It is also not the feminist movement’s job to convince men they should support it. All successful movements don’t ask to be listened to, they force people to hear them.
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James Donaldson is a Washington State University graduate (’79). After an outstanding basketball career with WSU, he went on to play professional basketball in the NBA with the Seattle Supersonics, San Diego/L.A. Clippers, Dallas Mavericks, New York Knicks, and Utah Jazz. He also played for several teams in the European Leagues in Spain, Italy, and Greece, and he toured with The Harlem Globetrotters to wrap up his career. James was an NBA All-Star in 1988 while playing center for the Dallas Mavericks. In 2006, James was inducted into the Pac-10 Sports Hall of Fame and also the Washington State University Athletic Hall of Fame. In 2010, James was elected as a board member for the NBA Retired Players Association.
James frequently conducts speaking engagements (motivational, inspirational, educational) for organizations, schools, and youth groups.
In 2010, James was the recipient of the NBA Legends of Basketball ABC Award, awarded for outstanding contributions in Athletics–Business–Community.
He believes in being a role model for success and professionalism to the scores of young people to whom he devotes so much of his time. He currently serves on several boards and committees and is a member of many organizations.
James believes in developing relationships that create a “Win-Win” environment for everyone involved, and in being the best he can be!
For more information about James Donaldson or to request he speak at your event, contact him at:
James Donaldson is the author of “Standing Above The Crowd” and “Celebrating Your Gift of Life” and founder of the Your Gift of Life Foundation which focuses on mental health awareness and suicide prevention, especially pertaining to our school aged children and men.
If you’re interested in having James come and speak to your group of young adults, business entrepreneurs, aspiring political and community leaders, and athletic teams, please contact him at jamesd@yourgiftoflife.org and or leave a personal message for him at 1-800-745-3161. Keep up with him and read about how he is reaching out and making a difference in the lives of so many around the world at www.yourgiftoflife.org
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