A View From Above on Things That Make The World Go 'Round
James Donaldson on Mental Health – The Real Face Of Depression
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by Lateefah Fleming
This is the face of depression. A gorgeous smile. The pearly whites showing. The head tilted back in laughter. The “boss babe” look. The face of someone who really does love life but doesn’t always feel like she can make it through life.
I am a wellness motivator, coach and professional. After 20 years in the business, I have covered a lot of ground: I have mentored, held managerial positions and taught others how to run their businesses. I love the process of helping women find their voices and to reach for their own power. It is an honor, and I am here for anyone who needs me.
Despite the abundance of personal successes and fulfilling work, depression is a constant in my life. It feels like a continuous knocking on my door — a soft but persistent knocking, always letting me know that it is still there. Eventually, it gets a little louder, and I cannot ignore it anymore.
I try my best to be busy: to go out, to talk on the phone — sometimes, I drink — to avoid that gnawing feeling, that incessant knocking. Then that level knocking turns into a steady pounding, and I have to fight even harder to get it under control. The fight is an all-out battle raging within me all while carrying on like a “normal” person.
Sometimes, I feel like I can’t function. I will have bouts of shortness of breath, moments where I’m fighting back tears and days where it takes every ounce of life within me to get out of bed.
It irritates me when I tell someone about my depression, and they shrug and say, “hey, everyone gets depressed, no big deal.” And then, there’s the well-intentioned, “you’ll feel better,” as if there is one thing that made you feel a little low.
My depression is not situational — it is not something triggered by the day-to-day disappointments. I have had dealt with tremendous setbacks and survived some horrible trauma, and my battle is more complicated than feeling a little down.
Thankfully, I am not doing this alone. It took me some time to seek help, but I eventually found a wonderful therapist who has given me tools to cope and provides a space for me to be raw, honest and vulnerable. She witnesses with my ups and downs while remaining caring and honest. And I need that.
I also have my yoga and meditation, a healthy lifestyle and, perhaps most importantly, time with friends. With the help of my therapist, I am learning to be honest with them about what I am feeling. No longer do I feel ashamed, embarrassed or even weak. Depression is a part of me but not the definition of who I am — and it is not something to keep from my loved ones. I still feel vulnerable when sharing my story and welcoming an audience behind the “veil” of happiness and success. In fact, this was difficult for me to write. But I want to emphasize the importance of taking mental health issues seriously, particularly in the Black community. Thankfully, I can do this with the support of my amazing community. They have empowered me to be a warrior, a proud Black woman and a global citizen.
Ultimately, I want to be an example to anyone fighting a similar battle. Lately, I have chosen to believe in myself and focused on the triumphs — my ability to speak up when I am not well, to identify and honor both “good” and “bad” days. Knowing I am not alone and finding strength in those who fight the same fight is empowering.
#James Donaldson notes: Welcome to the “next chapter” of my life… being a voice and an advocate for #mentalhealthawarenessandsuicideprevention, especially pertaining to our younger generation of students and student-athletes. Getting men to speak up and reach out for help and assistance is one of my passions. Us men need to not suffer in silence or drown our sorrows in alcohol, hang out at bars and strip joints, or get involved with drug use. Having gone through a recent bout of #depression and #suicidalthoughts myself, I realize now, that I can make a huge difference in the lives of so many by sharing my story, and by sharing various resources I come across as I work in this space.#http://bit.ly/JamesMentalHealthArticle Find out more about the work I do on my 501c3 non-profit foundation website www.yourgiftoflife.org Order your copy of James Donaldson’s latest book, #CelebratingYourGiftofLife: From The Verge of Suicide to a Life of Purpose and Joy
James Donaldson is a Washington State University graduate (’79). After an outstanding basketball career with WSU, he went on to play professional basketball in the NBA with the Seattle Supersonics, San Diego/L.A. Clippers, Dallas Mavericks, New York Knicks, and Utah Jazz. He also played for several teams in the European Leagues in Spain, Italy, and Greece, and he toured with The Harlem Globetrotters to wrap up his career. James was an NBA All-Star in 1988 while playing center for the Dallas Mavericks. In 2006, James was inducted into the Pac-10 Sports Hall of Fame and also the Washington State University Athletic Hall of Fame. In 2010, James was elected as a board member for the NBA Retired Players Association.
James frequently conducts speaking engagements (motivational, inspirational, educational) for organizations, schools, and youth groups.
In 2010, James was the recipient of the NBA Legends of Basketball ABC Award, awarded for outstanding contributions in Athletics–Business–Community.
He believes in being a role model for success and professionalism to the scores of young people to whom he devotes so much of his time. He currently serves on several boards and committees and is a member of many organizations.
James believes in developing relationships that create a “Win-Win” environment for everyone involved, and in being the best he can be!
For more information about James Donaldson or to request he speak at your event, contact him at:
James Donaldson is the author of “Standing Above The Crowd” and “Celebrating Your Gift of Life” and founder of the Your Gift of Life Foundation which focuses on mental health awareness and suicide prevention, especially pertaining to our school aged children and men.
If you’re interested in having James come and speak to your group of young adults, business entrepreneurs, aspiring political and community leaders, and athletic teams, please contact him at jamesd@yourgiftoflife.org and or leave a personal message for him at 1-800-745-3161. Keep up with him and read about how he is reaching out and making a difference in the lives of so many around the world at www.yourgiftoflife.org
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