BY GEMMA CLAY
Gemma Clay
People are now speaking more openly about #mentalhealth, however, #suicide is still a taboo subject to talk about, especially within the nursing profession.
Is everyone at risk of #suicide? Is #suicide preventable? Yes.
“I can write so much on the impact of shame and the damage this #stigma can have on a #nurse”
People experiencing #suicidalthoughts often struggle to be heard. This could be due to myths surrounding #suicide, such as the idea that talking to a suicidal person can make them even more suicidal.
Another myth is that people who talk about #suicide are attention seeking and difficult to manage, when in fact even though bringing up #suicide can be very difficult, it suggests that the person wants and needs help.
Within healthcare, #nurses are scared and bound into silence. This is due to the #stigma of #mentalhealthproblems and the fear of referrals to professional bodies like the Nursing and Midwifery Council (NMC).
We need discussions around #mentalhealth and #suicide to be a part of everyday conversations. When we acknowledge the problem it shows strength instead of weakness and encourages #nurses to talk and not wait until they get into a state of crisis to get help.
I can write so much on the impact of shame and the damage this #stigma can have on a #nurse.
I attempted #suicide a few years ago and, as a result, I lost my job and had an NMC referral, which was later resolved.
During the NMC investigation, I could still practise as a #nurse and continued to get promoted to clinical lead and matron roles but it was hard. Even now, years later, I still feel I have to constantly prove myself.
Prior to my attempt, I did talk to my manager and explained I was struggling. Looking back, I don’t think she knew how to support and manage a member of staff who was struggling for the first time with their #mentalhealth.
I felt ashamed and was worried I wouldn’t be listened to, so I felt I didn’t deserve to be a #nurse anymore. I continued to come to work while I was suicidal. My uniform felt like putting on armour but I was just acting like I was fine.
At the end of the day, we are #nurses and we are strong. I worked hard and took on more responsibilities when really I felt trapped in a spiral of #suicidalthoughts. I felt ashamed, even though I was honest with my manager and I had no support.
Since my attempt, I have worked with organisations to adapt their policies and create a manager’s guide.
#James Donaldson notes:
Welcome to the “next chapter” of my life… being a voice and an advocate for #mentalhealthawarenessandsuicideprevention, especially pertaining to our younger generation of students and student-athletes.
Getting men to speak up and reach out for help and assistance is one of my passions. Us men need to not suffer in silence or drown our sorrows in alcohol, hang out at bars and strip joints, or get involved with drug use.
Having gone through a recent bout of #depression and #suicidalthoughts myself, I realize now, that I can make a huge difference in the lives of so many by sharing my story, and by sharing various resources I come across as I work in this space. #http://bit.ly/JamesMentalHealthArticle
Order your copy of James Donaldson’s latest book,
#CelebratingYourGiftofLife:
From The Verge of Suicide to a Life of Purpose and Joy
www.celebratingyourgiftoflife.com
This guide covers conversation starters, supporting staff experiencing problems with their #mentalhealth, making reasonable adjustments, helping in a crisis, self-care and signposting to other resources. The guide is to be attached to my trust’s health and wellbeing policy.
In my view, communication is vital when helping colleagues. All #healthprofessionals need to provide a culture that helps and encourages people to speak up. Knowing what to say and what to do when someone is having thoughts of #suicide can save lives.
My main advice to anyone feeling suicidal is to talk to someone. Don’t stay silent, as it is hard going through this alone.
“My main advice to anyone feeling suicidal is to talk to someone. Don’t stay silent”
Talk to a friend, a family member or a colleague. If you do not want to talk to someone you know then contact a helpline so you can remain anonymous. But please seek help and do not go through this alone.
Being open and honest about #suicide and your #mentalhealth does not mean the end of your career. I have been promoted several times, I am currently studying for a PhD and I am an advocate for #mentalhealth in my trust.
I have won many awards, I was a finalist for #Nurse of the Year with the Nursing Times in 2020.
Writing this I hope helps others to speak up, and support education in helping to stop the #stigma around talking about #suicide in nursing.
Is #suicide uncomfortable to talk about? Yes, it is. Talking to someone and having someone listen can save a life.
The way we talk about #suicide matters.
Gemma Clay, #nurse and clinical doctorate fellow, University Hospitals Sussex NHS Foundation Trust
James Donaldson is a Washington State University graduate (’79). After an outstanding basketball career with WSU, he went on to play professional basketball in the NBA with the Seattle Supersonics, San Diego/L.A. Clippers, Dallas Mavericks, New York Knicks, and Utah Jazz. He also played for several teams in the European Leagues in Spain, Italy, and Greece, and he toured with The Harlem Globetrotters to wrap up his career. James was an NBA All-Star in 1988 while playing center for the Dallas Mavericks. In 2006, James was inducted into the Pac-10 Sports Hall of Fame and also the Washington State University Athletic Hall of Fame. In 2010, James was elected as a board member for the NBA Retired Players Association.
James frequently conducts speaking engagements (motivational, inspirational, educational) for organizations, schools, and youth groups.
In 2010, James was the recipient of the NBA Legends of Basketball ABC Award, awarded for outstanding contributions in Athletics–Business–Community.
He believes in being a role model for success and professionalism to the scores of young people to whom he devotes so much of his time. He currently serves on several boards and committees and is a member of many organizations.
James believes in developing relationships that create a “Win-Win” environment for everyone involved, and in being the best he can be!
For more information about James Donaldson or to request he speak at your event, contact him at:
www.StandingAboveTheCrowd.com
JamesD@StandingAboveTheCrowd.com
1-800-745-3161 (voicemail & fax)
James Donaldson is the author of “Standing Above The Crowd” and “Celebrating Your Gift of Life” and founder of the Your Gift of Life Foundation which focuses on mental health awareness and suicide prevention, especially pertaining to our school aged children and men.
If you’re interested in having James come and speak to your group of young adults, business entrepreneurs, aspiring political and community leaders, and athletic teams, please contact him at jamesd@yourgiftoflife.org and or leave a personal message for him at 1-800-745-3161. Keep up with him and read about how he is reaching out and making a difference in the lives of so many around the world at www.yourgiftoflife.org
