Greg Smith
My cousin’s 15-year-old son committed #suicide.
Caught up in activities with school friends that got out of hand, he had made a promise to do some things that did not go the way he planned. Sick and afraid, at church with his family, he had his mother take him home. She put him to bed, then went downstairs to get him some water. A single shot rang out. He had been so afraid of disappointing his parents, getting into trouble with them, that he made a decision to take his life rather than to face what seemed like insurmountable troubles. His devastated parents, who were so proud of him and loved him unconditionally, would never have the chance to explain to him that a parent’s love is not predicated on perfection but on a bond so strong that even death could never break it.
#JamesDonaldson notes:
Welcome to the “next chapter” of my life… being a voice and an advocate for #mentalhealthawarenessandsuicideprevention, especially pertaining to our younger generation of students and student-athletes.
Getting men to speak up and reach out for help and assistance is one of my passions. Us men need to not suffer in silence or drown our sorrows in alcohol, hang out at bars and strip joints, or get involved with drug use.
Having gone through a recent bout of #depression and #suicidalthoughts myself, I realize now, that I can make a huge difference in the lives of so many by sharing my story, and by sharing various resources I come across as I work in this space. #http://bit.ly/JamesMentalHealthArticle
Halfway through the year in Aiken County, we had already had 21 suicides. Twenty-one people who decided for myriad reasons that life was unbearable, that there was something better, that they were too ashamed to go on, that the hurts were too harsh or the damage too deep. Some probably left notes. Some probably left clues pointing to what was about to happen. Some probably made the decision, told no one and carried out a plan that they saw as redemption. I don’t know the stories behind the decision to end each one of these lives, but I’m sure there were stories to share.
Who were they? Nineteen of them were #males and two were #females. Their ages ranged from 16 to 95 years old. Nineteen were white, one was #black and one was #Hispanic. Eleven of them had alcohol or other drugs on board at the time of death. Overwhelmingly, they killed themselves with guns. Fifteen males decided to end their lives using guns.
Do these numbers, our numbers, mirror the national ones? According to an article in the Wall Street Journal, “To Lower Suicides, Methods Matter,” by Jo Craven McGinty, 47,173 people killed themselves in 2017. This was up from 29,350 people in the year 2000, according to the #AmericanFoundationforSuicidePrevention and the #CentersforDiseaseControl.Suicide is the 10th leading cause of death according to the CDC. Those at greatest risk are white males – middle-aged white males. People like me, and probably like a few of you reading this column, folks. In 2017, white males like me accounted for 70% of all suicides. White #women accounted for 19%. Men of color made up 8% and women of color only 2.5%.
Firearms are the most common method of #suicide used by #men. In 2017, 56% of #males who committed #suicide killed themselves with a firearm. Do our Aiken County numbers mirror the national ones? I think that is easy to see.
One thing that I found fascinating about the Wall Street Journal article was that whether someone acts on the urge to commit #suicide may hinge on having access to their preferred method in a moment of crisis. Because of the percentage of suicides involving guns, wrote Ms. McGinty, the #AmericanFoundationforSuicidePrevention and the National Shooting Sports Foundation are working together to encourage the safe storage of firearms. I am not personally against guns by any means (I do not own guns at this time, but I have a younger brother who has been an avid hunter all his life), but the bleak statistics involving firearms and deaths by #suicide are simply too awful to ignore. If someone is struggling and has access to an unsecured and loaded gun at the time of their most severe crisis, tragedy is simply too often the result. Blocking access to this most lethal of methods may indeed save lives.
In the world of #mentalhealthtreatment, we already do a fairly good job of screening for issues including suicidality and plans to harm oneself. However, given the statistics above, we must do better. Eighty-three percent of those who die by #suicide have seen a health care provider in the year before their death. Aiken-Barnwell #MentalHealth is using the Zero Suicide initiative (www.zerosuicide.com) to address this terrible problem. This system uses evidence-based tools, systematic practices and embedded workflows to strive for continuous quality improvement in the assessment, screening and addressing of #suicidalideation in everyone who walks through our doors. It involves systematic changes and improvement in training, identifying those at risk, engaging in a meaningful way, treating #suicidal thoughts and behaviors, and making good transitions to ongoing care and follow-up once the acute crisis has passed.
What can you do?
Remember this number for the #NationalSuicidePreventionLifeline: 1-800-273-TALK.
Secure your guns if you own them.
Listen. Ask questions. Respond. Act.
Consider participating in the Out of Darkness Walk on Nov. 10 at 2 p.m. at the H. Odell Weeks Activity Center in Aiken.
I have lost patients, family members, neighbors and coworkers to #suicide. I wager that many of you reading my column this week have had similar experiences and losses. It will take all of us working together to bring about meaningful change that leads to the end of #suicide.
James Donaldson is a Washington State University graduate (’79). After an outstanding basketball career with WSU, he went on to play professional basketball in the NBA with the Seattle Supersonics, San Diego/L.A. Clippers, Dallas Mavericks, New York Knicks, and Utah Jazz. He also played for several teams in the European Leagues in Spain, Italy, and Greece, and he toured with The Harlem Globetrotters to wrap up his career. James was an NBA All-Star in 1988 while playing center for the Dallas Mavericks. In 2006, James was inducted into the Pac-10 Sports Hall of Fame and also the Washington State University Athletic Hall of Fame. In 2010, James was elected as a board member for the NBA Retired Players Association.
James frequently conducts speaking engagements (motivational, inspirational, educational) for organizations, schools, and youth groups.
In 2010, James was the recipient of the NBA Legends of Basketball ABC Award, awarded for outstanding contributions in Athletics–Business–Community.
He believes in being a role model for success and professionalism to the scores of young people to whom he devotes so much of his time. He currently serves on several boards and committees and is a member of many organizations.
James believes in developing relationships that create a “Win-Win” environment for everyone involved, and in being the best he can be!
For more information about James Donaldson or to request he speak at your event, contact him at:
www.StandingAboveTheCrowd.com
JamesD@StandingAboveTheCrowd.com
1-800-745-3161 (voicemail & fax)
James Donaldson is the author of “Standing Above The Crowd” and “Celebrating Your Gift of Life” and founder of the Your Gift of Life Foundation which focuses on mental health awareness and suicide prevention, especially pertaining to our school aged children and men.
If you’re interested in having James come and speak to your group of young adults, business entrepreneurs, aspiring political and community leaders, and athletic teams, please contact him at jamesd@yourgiftoflife.org and or leave a personal message for him at 1-800-745-3161. Keep up with him and read about how he is reaching out and making a difference in the lives of so many around the world at www.yourgiftoflife.org
