James Donaldson on Mental Health - Back-to-School Anxiety

When separation problems persist Leaving a child who is crying or whining at school is a tough thing for any parent to do.

“But most kids are pretty resilient,” Dr.

Busman notes, “and we don’t want to underestimate their ability to cope.

Most kids recover quickly once mom or dad leaves.” If your child’s teacher reports that they bounce back and participate enthusiastically in activities during the day, the best way to help them get more confident about separating from you is not worrying too much about their complaints.

“It’s not being a bad parent to ignore a little bit of whining or reluctance,” says Dr.

“It will actually help a child move beyond it if you give more attention to things that you do want to see them do.” You want to give specific praise for brave behavior.

For example, remind them you will be back to get them and tell them things like, “Great job coming to preschool today.

When I pick you up I hope you’ll tell me something fun you did.” “The way we as adults interact and react is so important: a little bit of active ignoring, a little bit of positive attention and a lot of encouragement,” Dr.

If kids continue to have full-blown separation problems, and fears that something bad will happen to their parents interfere with their ability to function in school, they should be evaluated by a mental health professional.

Stomachaches and headaches Anxiety about school sometimes takes the form of headaches and stomachaches in the morning that kids say make them too sick to go to school.